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BIO
Reggae and Ska: Two styles of music, one born of the other. Both tug at your heart and feet, making you want to move and groove. Two styles of music that are rare in Pennsylvania, Maryland and
Delaware.
Reggae and Ska: Two styles of music that have always been about social change, racial equality, political issues and global consciousness.
Are you tired of hearing the same old thing? Fink's Constant is ready to bring refreshing sounds of original music to your area.
Fink's Constant is comprised of five men. Chad McCartney's trumpet can cut through a room like a laser or bathe you in a warm sound that feels as good as a hot shower. Either way at the end of the night you know you're clean from the sermon Chad's delivered with his horn.
Don Wood's trombone croons, with deep, blended tones, like your father laying down the law or calling you home, proclaiming it's time for knowledge to be dispensed. Fingers dance across a guitars fret board drawing the ladies in with strength, speed and accuracy. Youthful enthusiasm pushes
Zak Nye's sound forward whether taking the lead or laying sown a rhythm binding each piece together like the glue for a book-binding spine. Lights bounce off a sheer head as the freight train known as
Mike Fox moves in to deliver his lyrics with the force of a hurricane. A dire plead balanced with humor from a man who respects the message but refuses to take himself too seriously. All this great sound must have something to stand on.
Marlin Bressi on bass provides a concrete pillar thor this house to sit upon., and anchor that keeps the ship from drifting to far from home. Meanwhile,
Andy Hartman IS this vessels engine, it's heartbeat. His snare, kick and high-hat like the hands of a clock that not only keep time, but makes time.
For five years Fink's Constant has honed and perfected it's sound playing over 250 gigs at over 50 different venues. Fink's Constant has a library of over 60 songs, over 40 of which are originals written by either Mike Fox or Chad McCartney. The band has also self-produced four albums, three studio and one live, earning the respect of anyone they have played for. Fink's Constant continues to write, record and seek out new places to perform to further their musical message.
Are you tired of hearing the same old thing?
Mike
Fox
Mike Fox, front man and leader of
Fink’s Constant, is a musical jack-of-all-trades.
He tirelessly works as the bands primary songwriter and singer
all while playing guitar and trumpet….sometimes simultaneously.
Not only is Mike the man behind the music, he is also the
mediator between all other members of the band.
This is sometimes a daunting task, due to different attitudes,
moods and levels of intoxication. Part
time diplomat and full time lady’s man he needs to watch himself with
the women because it will sometimes send them into a sexual frenzy.
Unexplainable behavior such as exposing their breasts and
throwing underwear onto stage are often the result of a wink or nod from
the fearless leader. When
mike is on stage hold onto your girlfriends and be prepared for the
multi-talented musical experience.
Chad
McCartney
Name:
Chad
McCartney
Alignment:
Lawful Good
Class:
Monk
Strength:
14
Intelligence:
17
Wisdom:
18
Dexterity:
17
Constitution:
15
Charisma:
15
Chad
is the eldest and wisest member of Fink’s Constant.
His patience and level-headedness can bring a sense of calm to
the most volatile
of situations.
Chad
receives a +5 to all saving throws vs. drunks, hot-heads, Zak and other
trumpet players. His
greatest assets to the group are his abilities on trumpet.
Alone his trumpet is considered a +3 magic weapon although in
Chad
’s hands his trumpet has other impressive abilities.
When
Chad
plays more than sixteen notes in succession at a note value of 32nd
notes or greater the listener must make a save vs. confusion or be
momentarily stunned by his virtuosity.
Likewise when Chad plays multiple notes above a double C the
listener must also make a saving throw vs. headache, however if the
person is within 4 ft. of the end of the trumpet’s bell the listener
must save vs. death. Even
without his trumpet
Chad
has other impressive abilities.
Chad
has studied the martial arts and can kill you with his bare hands in a
plethora of ways. If you are
unlucky enough to encounter him near a selection of weapons, he can
inflict fatal damage using butterfly swords, sai, staff, and bobby pins.
Due to his monk-like training in the ways of meditation
Chad
is able to provide his own inner heat.
If the van breaks down in temperatures below 32 degrees,
Chad
receives a +20 to all saving throws vs. cold.
Chad
is a pillar in the hierarchy of Fink’s Constant, it is suggested that
you allow him to meditate in moments of peace and quiet so that he will
be at his best when the melee of music begins.
Do this and he will certainly vanquish any musical enemies that
venture your parties way.
Don
Wood
There once was a young man named Don
who had quite a lot going on
so busy was he
that anyone could see
that his free time was nearly all gone
His day starts off loading big trucks
but his drivers are running amok
<RRING RRING>"Yes---what's that?"
"your tire is flat?"
"You're fired, you incompetent *@#$!"
<RRING RRING RRING RRING> "Yes, Hello?"
"the oil in the van is too low?"
"I'll fix it tonight,"
"though my schedule is tight,"
"and I have a pit practice, you know."
Marching Band during the fall,
but willing to help if you call.
Fink's Constant all night
yet he's up at first light,
Good God, how's juggle it all??
At the end of another long day,
filled with crisis, havoc and dismay,
(with fast food and Tums on the way)
he shuts off the (damn) phone
picks up his trombone,
and blows all his troubles away,
Hurray!
Marlin
Bressi
Likes: to smile/Jumping around in a "having fun" sort of manner while playing gigs.
flat...er...no...chested...ummm...CHICKS
Dislikes: not having a microphone
when busty chicks flash the band while play9ing because he loses
concentration
Fav. thing to say to a girl: Do you have ID?
Fav. TV show: The Smurfs
Zak
Nye
Hi,
I'm Zak Nye, you've probably never heard of me because I'm in a band with a bunch of losers. The name of my band is "Zak and the Losers." I'm the only one in the band that gets to bang hot chick's on a regular basis. I can also tell you which chicks in the room want me on sooo many levels. Chicks dig me because I play gitar like a mad man, I drink beer like a fish, and I'm hung like a horse. I like getting lot's of chicks because then they can give me a ride and then give me a ride home if you know what I mean. So if you're ever in a bar and you can't hear yourself think because of the screaming ( horns played by the losers), don't fear, just stand in front of my amp, watch me drink beer, listen to my God-like guitar riffs and ask me for my number. I'll give it to you for a ride, oh, and my cat's breath smells like cat food.
Andy
Hartman
While most of the world knows Andy as the drummer for Fink's Constant, he is also a man of many talents. he speaks fluent Swahili, he can read Ebonics, and in his spare time he teaches tap-dancing to amputees and the paraplegic.
During his brief stint as a goat-herder in the mountains of Peru, he suffered a mental breakdown and became a hermit in the South American wilderness for several years. It was during this time that he began playing drums fashioned out of the skins of monkeys to stave off his boredom. And because he really hated monkeys.
To this day, Andy whittles his own sticks from the tree that grows in his back yard; a tree that has very special meaning.
"This tree is special because my grandmother choked to death on a peach pit in this very yard," explains Andy. "After the funeral, my family planted the peach pit as memorial, and I have whittled my sticks from her branches ever since."
And that, dear fans, is Andy Hartman. More than a drummer. More than a goat-herding tap-dancing redhead. He is our idol, wothy of our praise and adulation. Why? Simple, because he gets to bang more thins than the rest of us. Andy, you are truly a magnificent bastard!
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